Great personal and informative post FishOutofWater.
No need to apologise for your country's chaos because I presume that you didn't have a hand in it. So you carry no responsibility imo.
Thanks for mentioning that your familiy is harshly affected by your national health care, what ever that term means in the U.S.A.. I think sometimes about the enormous hidden suffering out-of-sight of many millions of your fellow countrypersons of all colours and legalities.
But because I'm poor and chose the difficult but correct paths, I know that as a person the best way to grow is in facing adversity. You have the advantage of having a family and so can endure the adversity together and become ever more stronger as a family. I understand that when it's about life and death and pain etc. it doesn't feel like you're growing, but the growing is about how you and your family handle the situations and especially your own emotions, morality and balance. Some families find themselves in Moria, Greece, or getting their children taken from them and enprisoned at the doorstep of their destination. In relating to all others who suffer adversity in this callous insane culture, there's much information to be found about oneself and ones personal situation.
I wish you and yours strength, understanding, unity and moral clarity.